One day at a time…

One day at a time;

I’m told I say it a lot. I must because my daughter has it tattooed on her foot!

I should explain:

My youngest daughter is 23; she lives at home while she is going to college. She is not huge into tattoos like her brother is, but she does have a few here and there. She came to me one day, gave me a pen and a piece of paper and told me to write down the following: “One day at a time”. At the time, she did not tell me what it was for until I had finished writing it and she had taken the paper from me. Looking back, I wish I had known and taken the time to write a little neater because now she proudly displays my scribbly scrawl there on her foot for all to see –looks like it was written by a “C” average ten year old. My guess is, she wanted to display something to remind her of her parents as the years go on. Someday we won’t be here anymore and when that day comes she can toss off her shoe and say:

“This is my Dad”

As A conversation starter.

Actually, I’m honored. After all, she could have chosen to just Write: “Jerk”, or “Ass-Hole” and used that as a way to bring up old memories… So I guess I’m not doing too badly in the father category.

Anyway… Back to the point:

In all fairness, I know I do say this from time to time but lately I think I am forgetting what it reallymeans and how I can use it to improve my every day existence.

I also realize that under the category of “Helpful inspiring phrases”, this is probably one of those annoying expressions that most people get a little tired of hearing. Kind of like:

“It is what it is!”

For example. This is another of my favorites and to me, very profound! (More on this later).

The problem for me is that too often I find myself looking at one of the many mental and physical lists I try to keep and feeling overwhelmed. Sometimes, I get so overwhelmed that I fail the “One day at a time” law of existence. You know the lists I am speaking of; the ever popular “Do List”.

Some people write them down into notebooks and onto calendars. Still others doodle them on little scrapes of paper that end up in their pockets only to be turned into little blobs of goo once the washer is finished with them. In this modern age of ours, many people have digital electronic lists that sit on their “Smart Phones” and shares data with their laptops and Kindles. These lists can now fly through the “digital cloud” to synchronize with their office network so that their office list can be added and coordinated with their personal list. Now you too can be constantly reminded, wherever you go, about all those little things you forgot to do; yes you too can be nagged about just how far behind you really are. And, still others prefer to keep a mental list; nothing written, no digital do list zooming through the air… Just thoughts.

Unfortunately I tend to keep a mental list; a rambling jumble of thoughts carefully organized in the cavernous spaces of my head. If one is an organized person with a clear and focused thought process this can be a great way to keep track of things. Regrettably however, even the best of us can get distracted from time to time, sometimes for days at a time, until finally one thinks back and wonders:

“What was I working on…?”

Unfortunately, I am one of those people who really should keep ideas on more than just a mental list.

So what kind of lists do you keep, and if more than one, how many?

Mentally kept or not, in my head I have several. There is the “What do I need to get done today”, list –self-explanatory. This of course is usually divided into two intertwined but separate lists: “What do I need to get done today… at work, and …at home. Then there is the similar but farther reaching long term lists for each of the above two. These can be divided into …this week …this month …this quarter or this year, for example. You may also have a list for church, or for hobbies you have, or like me, for your blog. And then there is the famous “bucket list”; that list of things to do before you leave your earthly existence behind for more… heavenly pursuits.

However you keep your lists, they will all become worthless if you don’t remember the initial principal mentioned in this article:

“One day at a time”

To me, the problems usually begin when two elements exist at one time for any one given person. Those two items are:

1. One or more “Do Lists”
2. Life

Speaking for myself; no matter how good my intentions are, too often I get wrapped up in the daily routine of life, or I get involved (Hyper focused) on one thing or another, or I may go through an emotional slump or physical injury or ailment. I may even get over involved in one of my several lists; one of the ones that exist, but may not be very important. An example of this would be the “Advance to the next level in my game on the computer” list. It’s easy to do… You get hyper focused and before you know it you are days or even weeks behind.

That’s when it happens. That’s when “Life” gets in the way of accomplishing those “Do Lists”. When the Do List becomes so overwhelming that you mentally submit to that negative emotion that tells you

“What’s the point…?”

“One day at a time” thinking, combined with a few other phrases, can help make this process a whole lot easier. One day at a time is that phrase that allows you to focus on today. It reminds you that yesterday is past, and cannot effect today in any way (unless yesterday you decided to step in front of a speeding train, or get out of your car while it was merging into traffic on the expressway…). One day at a time also reminds us that tomorrow, at times, can also be unimportant.

For example, if your potential tomorrow is filled with; “What if I fail…” or “What if I look Stupid…” thoughts, or “What if I can’t”. In some ways, these can be good thoughts because they can force us to look at ourselves and adjust our thinking or our plans to make sure we do not… fail, or look stupid. However, in the context of what we are talking about here they can become stumbling blocks. They can become overwhelming negative thoughts that, instead of inspiring us, causes us to freeze up and do nothing.

After all… negative thinking tells us that doing nothing is better than being embarrassed, or failing, or realizing that you just don’t got what it takes…

“One day at a time” thinking says:

“Tomorrow will come. For now think about today and what you can do today. Think about how much better tomorrow will feel when today turns out to be productive and accomplished. Then, tomorrow, with that great feeling of accomplishment… do it again!”

Sometimes for me, especially in the case of, say, trying to follow a healthy eating regime (…A DIET), I even have to go to a smaller unit of measurement. Sometimes it’s “One Meal at a time”, or “One less cigarette or drink when tempted”, for example. Master these smaller units for a while and then graduate to the “One Day…” measurement.

“One day at a time” thinking also allows us to have a bad day sometimes. This is because when we do have a bad day, we simply go to bed, and when we wake up the next day, apply the above rule about yesterday (that it is past and cannot affect us…), and then start all over again with a new day.

“One day at a time”, thinking, or possibly the smaller version of it, can even help you with that evil overpowering list. If you find yourself overwhelmed and out done, with each element on that list weighting you down like a ball and chain… simply break it down into individual items. Then, take “One thing at a time”, finish it, and then bask in the glow. Prove to yourself that you can, and then do it again. Before you know it, that list will be nothing more than what it really is… a simple “Git-R Done” list.

There is one additional important key to “One day at a time”. It is learning to forgive. Simply put:

If you can’t forgive yourself for the mistakes you made in the past, then you will never be able to try again and succeeded in the future.

If God can forgive you for your mistakes-which he does- why can’t you forgive yourself?

Even as I write this blog entry, I have to keep saying to myself:

“Self!”

“You have to forgive and forget those entries you never did in the past, and focus on this one and the ones that are yet to come.”

Like how I did that? I mixed “One day at a time”, and forgiveness into one quick sentence. Now that’s cool!